Travel & MOtivation

I’ve been gone for a bit. Did you notice? I’ve had a couple of lovely pattern interruptions, (AKA retreats and vacations.) 

Would you like to hear about my recent trip to New Mexico? 

It was fantastic. My husband has been feeling called to work in the southwest since he was deployed there last year with a Disaster Medical Assistance Team (DMAT), so he wanted to explore it more with me. He planned the whole trip, and took care of all of the details. I had input and ideas along the way, but I wasn’t responsible for much.

And you know what? It was exactly what I needed.

You see, you might be like me; you have all the things at home under your umbrella of influence. You know when to pick the kids up from school, you know when the dogs need to go outside, you either know what you’re going to make for dinner or you have the weight of having to figure out what to make for dinner; you’ve got laundry to do as well as having to write content for your blog/email/social media. ALL THE THINGS! 

It wasn’t until the third day of our trip that I noticed the decrease of stress. Sure, there was still stress because we were traveling to new places, driving a lot and staying in new places every couple of days. But that overall, nagging heaviness that the whole world revolved around my decisions and actions was gone. It was a relief to just be. And to enjoy. 

And coming back home after letting go of all of the responsibility I can choose what responsibilities I need to pick up again, and which ones I can leave or ask for help with. 

And that is a good thing for me to notice. 

Leaving what is known and then returning lets me play with what I want to keep or change. I’m appreciating it. 

And it brings us something else for me to ponder: In Human Design, my motivation is Desire. Its counterpart is Innocence. Desire motivation would indicate that I live best when I decide to go after things, when I am decisive and take action towards it. Individuals with Innocence motivation work best when they just show up for life and let it happen. These two motivations flip-flop with each other. Desire motivation people, like me, slip into Innocence; Innocence people slip into Desire motivation. 

So, what does this mean, and why bring it up? Well, from the evidence I’m currently seeing: I haven’t written here or to my email audience in a couple of weeks, I’m feeling stuck and unmotivated, I’m sleeping in and meeting the day as it comes, I’m pretty sure I've slipped into Innocence motivation. So to help me get back to my proper motivation, I need to start making small decisions and taking action towards them.  

I guess the point of this bit of writing reminds me that 

1) it is good for me to have vacations so I can release some of my responsibilities; 

2) returning to “normal life” helps me see there are choices I can make on how to handle my responsibilities;

3) when I notice I’m keeping myself from making decisions and taking action, I’ve slipped into Innocence motivation;

4) I know how to move myself back into my correct motivation-start with small decisions and take small action steps. They do not have to be perfect, but I do need to take action.

Thanks for reading this bit of cathartic writing...it has helped me get back to myself.